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Copy of childs txt msgs?
latiaran
Member

Does Verizon have anything I can subscribe to that will send me a copy of the text msgs my daughters sends and recieves?

Like if she is txt'ing of her friends, and she sends or recieves a txt msgs from them, can I also recieve a copy of those as a text on my phone, with out her knowing that i am getting copies of them?

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Re: Copy of childs txt msgs?
somegirl
Novice

The short answer: No

At least, not without a court order, and even that is only a limited time span.

 

The long answer: Why do you feel you need to be sneaky about seeing what/who your daughter is texting anyway? Just check her phone. If she's deleting messages before you can see them, block her texting and/or take the phone away. (Or some other suitable punishment.)

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Re: Copy of childs txt msgs?
vmanisme
Member

Yea if you dont trust your kids with a phone than dont get them a phone.

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Re: Copy of child's txt msgs?
latiaran
Member

Gee, ask a simple question and get shamed. It never ceases to amaze me how people come on "forums" asking a simple question and usually 70% of the responses are people telling you what you need to be doing based on their personal beliefs.

First of all, I trust my daughter, very much so. But that still doesn't mean I can't be proactive and a concerned parent. I am  one of those parents that actually cares what is going on with their children. Yes, I could take the phone away from her, but why? First of all we don't have a landline, so she needs to be able to get in contact with someone in case of emergencies. Besides, what good is taking the phone away gonna do? Absolutely none. Yes I could call and have text blocked on her phone, but again, what good is that gonna do? I'm not one of these parents that "shelters" their kids from society and doesn't let them have any freedom or responsibility. I'm not saying she is talking about or doing things that she as a 15 year old shouldn't be. But what is the point in shutting off the phone or blocking text messages. Yeah her and her friends may not be able to talk or text about "inappropriate things" and be mischievous over txt. But that wouldn't stop them from talking about the same stuff at school or somewhere else.

And yes I know I could tell her she's not allowed to hang out and talk with certain people, but if I'm not around that doesn't mean she won't. I'm not trying to control my child so to speak, but I do want to know what is going on in my childs life. And yes she does delete them after she reads them, but I do the same. I don't see any wrong in that and don't believe that means she is hiding something. And why do I feel I need to be "sneaky", well it's simple really, because I am her parent, she lives under my care, and she is still a minor. So this isn't an issue about trusting or not trusting her, its about be a responsible parent and wanting to know what is going on in my childs life. Turn on the news and watch about these young kids that are being kidnapped and/or raped and/or killed. I think that is reason enough. I don't understand why people think taking things away and basically sheltering your kids from society is going to do any good. If that's the case then you might as tie the child to their bed, board up the bedroom windows, and deadbolt them in their bedroom. Because no matter what you do, where you're at, no matter how much talking you do to them about right or wrong and no matter how "proactive" you are. They are gonna be around it, they're gonna see it, and if they wanna do it, they're gonna do it. I don't care how much you talk to your kids, I don't care if your kids have a cell phone or not, I don't care if you "shelter" them (or atleast think you are) I can guarantee you that your kids aren't the perfect lil' angels you think they are. I can guarantee you they are doing things that you don't know about and they know they shouldn't be doing.

Furthermore, the next time somebody posts a simple yes or no question, just give them a simple yes or no. Why do you feel the need to tell your opinion on how they should handle their family/personal matters or want a reason why?

Now that being said, I know this was a long winded reply but 'Somegirl' asked why, so I gave my reasons why. But on the same note, thank your for your answers and opinions.

Good Day!

Re: Copy of child's txt msgs?
somegirl
Novice

I didn't say to take her phone/texting away for no reason, only if she's not allowing you to see the texts on the phone. I'm not suggesting that you should in any way keep your children "sheltered" from the big bad world. I'm saying that the only way to view the texts is on the phone itself, so check the phone.

 

No need to get defensive.

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Re: Copy of child's txt msgs?
arichard21
Member

 


latiaran wrote:

Gee, ask a simple question and get shamed. It never ceases to amaze me how people come on "forums" asking a simple question and usually 70% of the responses are people telling you what you need to be doing based on their personal beliefs.

First of all, I trust my daughter, very much so. But that still doesn't mean I can't be proactive and a concerned parent. I am  one of those parents that actually cares what is going on with their children. Yes, I could take the phone away from her, but why? First of all we don't have a landline, so she needs to be able to get in contact with someone in case of emergencies. Besides, what good is taking the phone away gonna do? Absolutely none. Yes I could call and have text blocked on her phone, but again, what good is that gonna do? I'm not one of these parents that "shelters" their kids from society and doesn't let them have any freedom or responsibility. I'm not saying she is talking about or doing things that she as a 15 year old shouldn't be. But what is the point in shutting off the phone or blocking text messages. Yeah her and her friends may not be able to talk or text about "inappropriate things" and be mischievous over txt. But that wouldn't stop them from talking about the same stuff at school or somewhere else.

And yes I know I could tell her she's not allowed to hang out and talk with certain people, but if I'm not around that doesn't mean she won't. I'm not trying to control my child so to speak, but I do want to know what is going on in my childs life. And yes she does delete them after she reads them, but I do the same. I don't see any wrong in that and don't believe that means she is hiding something. And why do I feel I need to be "sneaky", well it's simple really, because I am her parent, she lives under my care, and she is still a minor. So this isn't an issue about trusting or not trusting her, its about be a responsible parent and wanting to know what is going on in my childs life. Turn on the news and watch about these young kids that are being kidnapped and/or raped and/or killed. I think that is reason enough. I don't understand why people think taking things away and basically sheltering your kids from society is going to do any good. If that's the case then you might as tie the child to their bed, board up the bedroom windows, and deadbolt them in their bedroom. Because no matter what you do, where you're at, no matter how much talking you do to them about right or wrong and no matter how "proactive" you are. They are gonna be around it, they're gonna see it, and if they wanna do it, they're gonna do it. I don't care how much you talk to your kids, I don't care if your kids have a cell phone or not, I don't care if you "shelter" them (or atleast think you are) I can guarantee you that your kids aren't the perfect lil' angels you think they are. I can guarantee you they are doing things that you don't know about and they know they shouldn't be doing.

Furthermore, the next time somebody posts a simple yes or no question, just give them a simple yes or no. Why do you feel the need to tell your opinion on how they should handle their family/personal matters or want a reason why?

Now that being said, I know this was a long winded reply but 'Somegirl' asked why, so I gave my reasons why. But on the same note, thank your for your answers and opinions.

Good Day!


 

I trust my 13 year old daughter. but i still read her texts almost daily. she knows she is not allowed to delete them in case her mother or I want to spot check. she understands this as part of having the phone. she is to the point now that she reminds her friends when they start saying something inappropriate.

 

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Re: Copy of child's txt msgs?
Fred0924
Member

Thank you arichard21!!  For being an involved parent who cares!  I loved reading what you had to say. 

One thing that happened with one of our kids is that she sneaked out of the house to meet with a boy to go have sex and all by texting!  She is a good girl and this sort of thing had never happened before but she had been having a hard time since the divorce between Mom and Dad.  At&t has a way to read your children's text messages and after this I am tempted to change phone companies!!  It is appalling to me that Verizon has left us no way to try and protect our children.  It seems to me as a parent who is concerned about there children that if you see a child that is having a difficult time then you need to monitor there mind set.  The best way to do that is see what is in there mind.  They may feel unloved, or betrayed in some way and not know why they feel that way.  A lot of trauma happens to a child's heart after a divorce and sometimes the last person they will talk to is the adults in a situation like that and I believe that leaves them vulnerable to the rest of the world.   And this is only one example of a good reason to monitor your child's text messages.