Ok, so I am a Verizon FIOS subscriber living in Texas (which, last time I checked, was still part of the United States). So, on first my laptop, then my desktop computer, I try to access Starz Play, which I should be able to access as a.) a US citizen living in the United States with internet service through Verizon FIOS and b.) a subscriber to Starz.
When I bring up the site, this is what I see:

Ok, Verizon. What the heck is going on? Did Rick Perry succeed in seceding from the union while I slept? Or is your funky service now telling Starz that I'm living in a country outside the United States?
Fix this!