Yes, this is a lengthy rant. As my disdain for Verizon is rather strong right now. However my particular dealings with Verizon as of late are uniquely ridiculous and slimy... After reading up and down these message boards... so many posts from people who all have the same general problems with this company... it's hard to just focus on my main, personal grievences, and I can't help but address the multitude of garbage policies- the responses by the Verizon zealots who pollute these boards (and are more likely shills than real people)--and The actual Verion Reps on here as well, who, like the zealots, seem to offer no real advice other than to tell you you are wrong. and that their deals are actually great - after which they ask to private message you- so that everything looks nice in the message thread, while they proceed to just dissapoint you in private instead.
Anyway... I should sum up my particular problems for y'all before they are lost in the lengthy flood of additional general criticisms I surely will be typing a well- so here they are
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<> my brother dropped his phone in the ocean. He, I, and my mother all are on a plan together. My mom graciously pays our phone bills still even though we are adults now, but we do have account access as it was needed over the years going into the stores and such to get (much more pleasing, cheaper overall, contract) phones and such. Now my brother, he isn't the most tech savy. And when it comes to something like our bill, unlike me who wants to know the ins and outs even if Im not paying, he doesnt. He also trusts that a company weve been using for so long, isnt going to try and manipulate and flat out lie to him when he goes into the store to handle his Verizon needs. So back to the story- his phone went down to the bottom of the sea. So he went in to get a new one. He wouldnt know exactly how much is left to pay off on the ocean phone, but regardless, he like most people would tell the Rep " i need a knew phone, I destroyed mine, are there any deals available or upgrades?"
so here is the first lie. The rep says no. there is nothing. even though he is looking at our account and can clearly see that not only do I need a phone, so a 2 for 1 BOGO deal would be a good option. but also the other various deals on the Verizon website, he does not mention (which we all know, he knows they exist).
This rep also can see my brother has 85$ left pay on the old phone, 4 months. You cant get a new phone on a line with a phone that is on a payment plan, he tell my brother. Makes sense. So........ Ofcourse here is where he will say "so if you just pay 85$ and clear that out, we will set you up with a new phone in store" - a Scumbag answer since he isnt going to show my brother any deals, and only full priced phones... but fine, i guess. Surprisingly though, the rep had something else to say. instead of telling my brother that it was 85$, and he could just pay it off. He says that since 'you cant have two open payment plans on one line- we will just OPEN UP A NEW LINE FOR YOU, AND THEN PUT THE NEW PHONE UNDER THE NEW LINE. THAT WAY YOU DONT HAVE TO WAIT 4 MONTHS FOR YOUR OTHER PHONE TO BE PAID OFF! '(durrrrrrr) Then he will just switch the phones so that the new one is on on my brothers number number, and the lost one is on the new line and bam! You got your new phone. Sooo Easy!
now ofcourse, when I finally see the bill 2 months later since it autopays, and talk to my brother and figure out what happened, and my mouth is on the floor, thinking of how PSYCHOTIC of an option that Rep swindled and lied him in to. Because NOT ONLY would the opening up of a new line be the EXACT THING you have to do to get one of the awesome deals on a new phone...But it is also MORE COSTLY THAN JUST PAYING OFF THE 85$ ON THE LOST PHONE IN THE FIRST PLACE!!!! I am at a loss even thinking about it. I mean if we really had to open a new line, then heck why not mention the plethora of deals requiring one! Bogo, 5$ iphones, etc... But thats besides the point I guess, since a new line being needed is. a. blatant. lie.
If I wouldnt have caught it, and payed of the dang phone and shut down the dang line... If everything went just as the Rep set it up and wanted it to go- We would have paid 4 months x20$ for line access fees on a non existent line attached to a phone at the bottome of the ocean!!!! PLUS the one time fees for opening up the new line! The one time fees alone were almost enough to cover paying off the remainder of the old phone!!! It's ludicrous. WHY would anyone with half a brain ever do it like that? sit around for 4 months and pay 80 extra dollars in line acces fees.... plus the one time fees, making it 120-140$ more expensive? I guess maybe you would do that if its how you were TOLD you have to do it.... what kind of disgusting misrepresentation and lies is that for a company to do to any customer, let alone a family of 20yr customers!!!!?????
and as for my seperate story-
<>I need a new phone. Firist I bought a brand new 600 dollar galaxy 3 years ago from Verizon, which i stupidly left on a clothing display at Walmart 3 days after getting it. I had follishly yet to set up password protection, or any accounts as well ofcourse, so whoever decided to pick it up and not return it, obviously didnt have the normal problems a password protection would cause. But hey, it should be fine I thought, since I have the receipt, the serial number, the IME number, and all the other various information and #s which allow Verizon to CLEARLY see who is using the phone, where it is, what network it is connected to etc. To make the story short- No. I pleaded for weeks. Samsung told me Verizon could do it if they wished to. there were no laws, nothing. but nope. Im sure they wanted me to have to buy a new phone anyway, knowing Verizon 
so here I am now, after using a iphone 5 with a cracked screen for three years. deciding I want a new phone finally (plus you are wanting to stop old iphones from being usable on the network- although apple is as much the problem there as Verion). Anyway- ofcourse I see, there are no deals. besides garbage, nonsense, and 150$ off and already grossly overpriced selection of phones.
now I could technically I suppose, try the crazy garbage you have people having to do- like porting out to google voice, or porting over to ATT for 2 months of prepaid service, only to port back to verizon after, so it looks like I am a new customer. Or wait no, I got it! I COULD JUST OPEN A NEW LINE, CLOSE MY CURRENT ONE, AND EVERYTHING WORKS OUT FINE!! So its simple! Oh but, I cant keep my number you say? SureI cant ust switch it over, instead of using the new lines number?? Because really, its no difference... I mean, the only difference is what phone number the phone would be using. If customers are willing to accept a new number, you can just close your old line, and in terms of doing this with 1 line on a family plan. The bill would stay the exact same- just the new line and activation fees, and then whatever monthly amount for the phone deal I choose ( i think the 5/mo i7plus looks great ;] )
But for whatever psychotic reasoning. no. I cant keep my number. which for those of us who have had the same one for 15 years... it kind of really matters.
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So. Here's what I want from Verizon. I want all those insane, scheemed, connived extra fees we payed refunded. I want my brothers phone that is 7 weeks old RETURNED. And both of us will get either one of the new-line-cheap-deal phones. like the iphone 7. Or we will BOGO phones for both of us.
Not only did we have that ridiculous disgusting trick tried to be pulled on us. But my brother shouldnt have some garbage full price phone anyway. He asked left and right about what kind of deals can I get. heck he even had an upgrade and he still didnt get anything. They didnt even give him 100$ in store credit for accesories- which even I got a rep to offer me the other day atleast.
Its either that. Or we get our refund for that craziness (that part is non negotiable), and we will all go over to a different phone company.
that and I spend the rest of my days denouncing Verizon to as large an audience as possible.
That's where I am at right now.